Open Your Eyes
by ActuallyJess
Summary: Trucy oneshot. "Open your life now Open your life now I'll try to be All that you need me To be" I suck at a lot of things, like summaries, so you get song lyrics. Enjoy :)


**We all have that one ship that we want...**

_Open your eyes now  
open your eyes now  
it's time to see  
if you can reach me_

Lucy slowly opened her eyes, wincing as the sun shone through the window. The distant chirping of birds giving her already throbbing head a boost. Her hand moving the pillow to her left over her face to try and sleep a little bit longer. What she wouldn't give to have someone rock her back to sleep. Not just someone, but a certain _someone_. A certain someone who was in the sweetest dream she was having. A certain someone who currently was also the same someone who had hurt her more than she could have ever thought. Why did life have to be so complicated? Why couldn't their personal life stay personal? She just wanted a normal relationship. A normal relationship with Troian. It shouldn't matter what others thought about their life choices. Troian promised it wouldn't matter what others thought. She said it didn't bother _her_. But she lied. Or Lucy assumed she had. Since she didn't give Troian a chance to explain anything. The heart ache form realizing what Troian meant when she said she needed to talk to her as soon as possible too much for her to actually sit and listen to her. The ringing of Lucy's phone bringing her back out from under the pillow. Troian's name across her screen making her eyes tear and her teeth worry her bottom lip. She wanted to answer. More than anything she wanted to answer. To hear her voice. To have the comfort she once felt with her. Her thumb hovering over the answer button before quickly pressing down just to hear. Hear Troian's voice. She'd answer. But she won't give into talking. As long as she heard her, that would be fine for her.

"Luc? Babe, please. Are you there? I know you are, I can hear you breathing," Lucy bit her lip harder a small tear rolling down her check, promising herself that she wouldn't answer. "Just...please? I need you. Call me back when you're ready to stop biting your lip." Of course Troian would know she was biting her lip. Troian knew her inside and out. Just as she knew Troian inside and out. The memory of Troian's constant pleading for Lucy to stop the habit making her smile as she brought the phone down, making sure it was off. She knew she would end up calling Troian back. She always went to her. Staying away from someone as important as her wasn't an option for her.

_Open your eyes now  
__open your eyes now  
it's time to see_  
_if you still believe me_

Troian set the phone down next to her. Letting her head fall back as she closed her eyes. She loved Lucy, more than anyone or anything. Even when she was being too stubborn or letting her pride win. Those were the times, much to the shock of others, Troian loved the most about her. The determination she had. How she wouldn't let herself be wrong or lose. If she wanted something or knew something, she'd do anything and everything to make sure she was in the right. The clock to her left letting her know that she had been awake for more than a day. Lucy would be giving her _that look_. The look she gave when Troian did something that was good for her. Drinking more coffee than she should, not letting her drink her own coffee, over working herself, fussing over the simplest things. Lucy was always behind her, not saying anything but looking at her. Making Troian wish she would just be normal and scream at her when she did something wrong. Instead, she did the reverse. Because she knew how much Troian loved her voice. How much she craved to her hear sing her heart out to some overturned pop song. How she would talk anyone's ear off when they asked about something she loved. Or, Troian's favorite, how she would say her name in bed. Her knee bouncing as she stared at the phone. The black screen looking back at her, her over exhausted mind causing her to think it was laughing at her. Or maybe it was, she wasn't sure. All she knew was that she wasn't sleeping with Lucy, in their bed, with her tucked into her chest like every night. Waking up with Lucy's small snores, no matter how much she denied that she did in fact snore. She did. Every night. And every night Troian would stay up just a little bit longer to listen. The light from the phone making her focus on it as Lucy's name popped up. The smallest of texts she ever got from her reminding her that Lucy was mad. And it was because of her. And, unlike every time she was mad, this was going to be harder to fix.

_"I'm ready."_ Troian kept her eyes on the screen, her heart beat increasing if only a little bit more. She was ready. Lucy was ready. And Troian was sitting. Sitting and scared shitless to get up and go. Before, when she was focused on just talking to Lucy was one thing. Now she's passed through their memories together, looked though each crack and break in the fights they had. Wrapped herself into each smile or giggle that Lucy had with her. She wasn't ready to let that all go. If that was what Lucy wanted, she wasn't going to let it happen. Lucy may be ready for their talk, but now Troian was the one with cold feet. Reminding herself that, with Lucy, she would lead, and she would follow. But not if it meant Lucy was ready to let her go off on her own.

_She'll be a star now  
I will follow her lead_  
_she'll be a scar now_  
_I will still let her bleed_

Lucy walked around the room, fixing things that were already fixed. The photo of her and Troian at their third anniversary party getting moved an inch over. The coffee mug Troian failed to wash two days before finally making it into the dishwasher. Her hand stopping to fix the photo once more by the shrilling ring of the door bell. Biting down on her lip as she stared at it. Hoping it would open on it's own and Troian would be there ready to just stop the fighting and go back to happier moments together. Or better yet, how the floor would just swallow her right then and there. What if Troian didn't want to work things out? Lucy's nagging and hardheadedness finally catching up to her and causing Troian to want simpler things. With someone else. The biting on her lip increasing as she thought through all the negative things that could go wrong. The knocking on the door getting louder with each passing. Her heels clicking against the wood flooring of their apartment as she walked to it, unlocking the locks as slowly as possible. Doing anything and everything to prolong the fight they were sure to have once Troian was inside.

"Hey." Lucy moved aside, letting Troian walk in. "Coffee? Tea?" She passed Troian, walking into the kitchen to keep herself busy. Starting the coffee for Troian even without her asking. Setting up a pot of water to boil for the tea just in case. In case Troian wanted her favorite tea as she told Lucy she wanted out. Wanted her name off the lease. Rather her back hurting from an uncomfortable hotel bed because she couldn't stand sleeping with her in their bed anymore. Or the coffee so she can tell her how bitter she was. How much she's ruined them both.

"You really should stop biting your lip, Lucy. You're going to cut it open one day." _Lucy_. Not, Luc, Or Babe, or Baby like usual. But _Lucy_. She's never hated her name so much until then. The burn she always had when Troian was watching her hitting her again as she kept her back turned, focusing on the first few bubbles in the water.

"I just put your mug in the wash, want the other one?" Lucy let her lip go turning around to look at Troian fully for the first time since she walked in. The dark circles under her eyes making Lucy worried for her. The wrinkles in her clothes from the night before telling her she had just as bad of a night as she did. The way her fingers bounced on the bar as she looked at Lucy.

"Sure. I'll get it." Troian got up, going to stand a few feet away from Lucy as she pulled another mug out. It wasn't her favorite. But her favorite, the one she drank out of ever since Lucy gave it to her on her birthday five years ago, was washing. She knew Lucy put it in there. Since she always forgot to put it in to clean, choosing to leave the smudge Lucy's lipstick left when she stole small sips in the morning for as long as possible. "So. Should we talk now? Kind of just take it care of now?" Troian looked to Lucy, watching her as a thousand different emotions played on her face. How she wished she could just move in front of Lucy and hug her. Hug her and shield her from anything that would hurt her. Just like she used to. Until she decided to ruin it all.

"Yeah, let me finish up the tea first." Lucy turned away, closing her eyes to will away her tears. She wasn't going to cry. She wouldn't let herself cry. At lest not in front of Troian. She'll hold it all off, wait until she left to break down. But she will not let Troian see her hurt for her. She wasn't going to give that satisfaction.

Troian nodded, watching Lucy from the corner of her eye. How her shoulders tensed even more than before. How she kept her eyes on anything but Troian. This was it. Their bubble of love for each other was finally breaking and there wasn't any tape for Troian to fix it. She couldn't fix it. Lucy was tearing it down and she didn't know how to fix it the way she was supposed to fix it. Those promises she made about never letting Lucy go were now out the window. She couldn't do anything but sit back and watch. What could she do? Once Lucy wanted something, there was no stopping her. Her eyes scanning over the places she could see. The TV they fought over every Monday night was now turned off. The dog bed Troian bought Jack was now empty. The curtains they picked out together were closed off to the world. The coldness of the place making her shake. The photo. The photo of them smiling so big both their cheeks hurt. It was turned. No matter how many times Troian tried to move it, Lucy always scolded her, telling her how it was turned that way so their love could be seen from every point in the house. And now you could barely see it's face at all. Her eyes filling with tears. She was already doing it. Lucy was already pushing her out with the simplest things in their home. And it was all because of her. Her and her big mouth. How she wished she could turn back time, keep her mouth shut about how "just because it's legal in California for them to get married, doesn't mean she wanted to get married." Stupid. Troian shook her head looking away from the photo.

Lucy looked at Troian, watching her panic on the inside. She wanted to hold her. Rock her to safety like she always did. To tell her everything was going to be okay. They just hit a bump in the road. It was no big deal. They could fix it. They fixed everything. She made sure the TV stayed off for this. Deciding to give her undivided attention to Troian for this conversation. Taking Jack to a friend's house before Troian got her. His constant need to for love and affection might cause them to lose focus. At lest that's what Lucy told herself. The sun from outside too bright for her eyes, deciding to close them to ease her headache. The air conditioner set on a low setting, something Troian told her countless times she would call someone to fix but never did. Making her colder than ever last night when she didn't have her to hold her. "Can we sit down? Troy?" Lucy watched as Troian moved without a word, sitting down on the loveseat they had. The same loveseat that's seen a lot of naked skin and stolen kisses.

_Open your eyes now  
I'll try to be_  
_almost everything_  
_you need me to be_

Troian kept her eyes down, focusing on a small piece of the carpet as Lucy sat a few feet away from her just as quiet. "Can you just say something? Anything?" Troian looked up at her, waiting for her to start talking. To throw something. Hit her even. Anything to let Troian know how she was feeling. Sitting and waiting for her to say something wasn't simple. After their talk, Troian about how she worded things so very wrong, and Lucy about how she still couldn't just look past it all was hard at first, but like everything else with them they got easier. She seen what it was like from Lucy's point of view. Just as Lucy seen from her own. And either way you put it, it was hurtful. She hated how she made Lucy feel. How she was the one who caused Lucy's tears and wasn't here to fix it.

"I'm not sure what else I should say. I get what you mean, Troy, I really do. But it was still pretty mean. Especially in front of people. How you just shot down the idea of us getting married like it was nothing. No big deal. Just another piece of paper." Lucy shook her head, making tiny fists with her hands. Her lip between her teeth again as she willed herself not to cry. Crying wasn't an option. Not here and not now. She refused to cry anymore. She didn't want to fight. Fighting with Troian was the last thing she wanted. But she knew better than to hold back. Holding it all in just meant it would build up. Making things worse in the end. That's how her own parents ended. She didn't want that. She wanted Troian. She wanted a life with Troian. A forever with her. And she would go through what ever for that. "Like I said, I get it. But can we just...I don't know, not give up on the idea? I just want you, Troy. That's all I want. And if it means no wedding and just living how we are now, fine. But please, I'm begging, don't leave me." Lucy's lip quivered as she looked at Troian a lump in her throat keeping her from saying much else.

Troian grabbed Lucy's hand, pulling her into her lap, "I'm not going to leave. I swear even if you make me. I'm going to be pounding that door down until you let me back in." Her own eyes stinging from unshed tears as she held onto Lucy as tight as possible. Fear that if she let go she'll be gone. "I'm just as scared as you, Luc. You hold me together, and I'm so terribly sorry for putting you through that. I swear one day we'll be married. I'll go through hell to make sure you get the wedding you want." Kissing the top of Lucy's head as she cried, trying to be strong for both of them. Lucy's hands fisting her shirt, her face pushed against Troian's neck. Both of their breathing evening out after a few minutes, driec up tear stains on their cheeks. Lucy's movement cauing Troian to loosen her hold on her. "What's wrong? Luc?" Troian watched as Lucy bit her lip, her cheeks turning a bright pink.

"Nothing. I just wanted to look at you." Lucy leaned forward, her lip meeting Troian's own soft lip. They could taste the saltiness of their tears as they kissed. Lucy's hand moving up to tang in Troian's hair as Troian's hand moved to cradle the back of her neck. Lucy's eagerness and sudden need causing Troian to let out a soft moan. Her hands holding onto Lucy's hips tighter, groaning when Lucy pulled back a little, moving so she was straddling Troian now. "I just wanted to get a better angle." Her smile growing wider as Troian moved to kissing her jaw, biting just below her eye how she liked it. The heat between them growing as Lucy pulled on Troian's hair a little making her let out a soft moan. "Troy," Lucy looked down waiting for Troian to look at her face instead of her chest, "take me to bed." A small squeal emitting from her as Troian picked her up faster than she thought she would. Her legs wrapping around Troian's waist and her arm holding onto her neck. The shuffling of feet and quiet moan of a name the last thing before the slamming of a door cut through the otherwise well lived in home.

_She'll be a star now  
I will follow her lead_  
_She'll be a scar now_  
_I will still let her bleed_  
_All over me_

_**The End.**_

**-  
****I suck at ends so it's ending like that. Sorry for shit stuff. But it's like almost two in the morning, is that a good enough excuse? Also, the idea is kinda sorta based off of The Fosters idea with Lena and Stef. Because at first I was gonna use Troian cheated on Lucy but that hurts so no. Also, if it wasn't obvious, this is a oneshot. I don't usually do Girl/Girl, but Trucy is an exception.**


End file.
